Act III, Scene 1

When Bailey was very young, even before I brought her home, I started a photo Web site to document and share her growth.  The updates were fun, filled with hundreds of adorable photos documenting this period of rapid growth.  This was Act I—the puppy years, the growth years, the babe-magnet years. 

Updates to the website ended around Bailey’s first birthday but it was not until sometime in her second year that we transformed into Act II, the companion years.   During these years, Bailey was my faithful companion and my best friend. But, over the last year or so, I began noticing qualitative changes both in Bailey’s nature and in our relationship. I am not quite sure how to describe it: less command and obey, more mutual agreement; less her trying to please me, more my trying to comfort her; less my struggling to keep up with her, more her struggling to keep up with me; less focused on my needs and schedule, more focused on hers.  This began Act III—aging, closing, letting go.

I have heard from others about life with an old dog, but was still surprised by two things.  First, Bailey in Act III is a babe magnet again.  Women see her old face and stop, smile, bend down, ooh and pet her.  Who would have thought?  More important, I was surprised by my own feelings about her entering this last phase in her life and our relationship.  I am finding the events and changes during this phase just as precious and treasured as her early puppy development.  And I am feeling just as strong a need to document and share the process, although I am not fully clear why this is. 

I fear that some might find this blog morbid, morose or somehow inappropriate—I intend it to be none of these things.  Although I am sure there will be some discussion of trials and tribulations, this blog will not be an enumeration of each and every one of the symptoms, ailments and procedures that have already started and will only increase over however many months are left.  There will be no daily/weekly health status or symptom log.  Nor do I intend to focus on sadness or grieving, although I am quite certain there will be writings about both.  Rather, I intend to post more about the processes during this final Act—the processes of aging, closing, letting go, declining and (yes) dying—and the transformation of the man-dog relationship.

If you are not comfortable with these postings, that’s ok—you do not have to read them.  Honestly, I am not sure for whom I am writing this or even why, so I will be content even if I am the only person who reads these musings.  If you like, read the postings, comment, share, repost, whatever.  If not, please do not feel obliged in any way to follow this blog—I will hold no ill will, and Bailey is incapable of anything but love to all people.